第３９８堀：駄目神が動いた結果 (Part1)
### Chapter 398: The Result of the Useless Goddess Taking Action
**Side: Yuki**
"Alright, let's get the setup finished before Hifi and the others arrive."
"Boss, what about the cucumbers?"
"No, I don't need them. John, focus on the final adjustments for the answer podium. Make sure it rings properly. And check if the number plates are ready."
"……Understood."
Why are you leaving with such a sorrowful expression!? There is absolutely no need for cucumbers in these preparations. You aren't actually turning into a Kappa, are you?
"Yo, Boss. The traps and the bath area are ready."
"Got it. Keep the trap area off-limits. The bath area is going to get pretty messy, so is the cleaning crew ready?"
"Slimes are naturally suited for that kind of work. It’s fine."
"I see. In that case, go help John. I don't know why, but he’s been asking where to place the cucumbers, and I’m worried."
"……Understood. That guy."
With that, Surakichi-san leaves.
……It’s a bit late to mention this, but even the monsters without vocal cords just use magic to vibrate the air and speak normally. What a waste of magic and mana control. Still, it’s better than having them force thoughts directly into my head like telepathy, but it’s a growth I didn't anticipate.
It’s like those cars with automatic doors. I understand it for taxis, but I always thought it was overkill for a standard vehicle. Sure, it’s convenient when your hands are full of groceries. I suppose it removes the hassle of opening and closing doors for the elderly or children. You can manage the door from the driver's seat, after all. But if it’s for the elderly, there’s usually a caregiver nearby, and is it really good to spoil children like that? It removes the act of checking your surroundings before opening the door.
But, is it worth spending money on something that doesn't have many other uses? I guess the world is always evolving in ways that are slightly off-center from what I expect. Automatic doors on cars are becoming common, and automatic folding side mirrors are the norm now—back in the day, you had to do that manually. I guess this world is the same; people are putting effort into "useless" things, and in doing so, creating demand.
"Ah, Big Brother!"
"Brother!"
As I was thinking about this, Aslin and Firia ran up to me, followed by Labyris, Shera, and Dressa walking slowly behind them. All five of them were wearing adorable dresses.
"You two, no running."
"You'll mess up your dresses."
"And besides, why are we being forced to wear dresses like this? We were told we were just helping with an event, right?"
Labyris and Shera fixed the girls' disheveled dresses, while Dressa looked at me with a question mark floating over her head.
"That’s right. You’re definitely here to help."
"Then why the dresses? They’re going to get dirty!"
"You aren't in roles that require much moving around, so just stand by until then."
"Hmm. Is this a 'show off the pretty girls' kind of thing?"
"Well, something like that."
"……In that case, I feel like Yuki’s wives would be better suited for this, but whatever."
She’s the type who doesn't overthink things, as usual. It makes explaining things easy, but for the future, she’s going to need to study more. Lately, she’s been diving into dungeons with Vilia and the others, but I have a feeling she’s going to get seriously injured someday. I’ll have to keep an eye on that.
"So, Labyris, Shera, how are the preparations?"
"Yes, Lilishe-sama is standing by, and we are ready as well."
"Yes. I can move as your hands and feet at any time, Yuki-san. The preparations for 'that person' are also complete."
"Good. Then, it’s time to call the guests……"
Just as I thought that, a certain Useless Goddess came running over, brimming with excitement.
"Yoo-hoo!!"
Her energy level was through the roof. It was incredibly annoying. She was in her usual suit, but her movements were sharp, and you could tell she was highly motivated.
"Oh, it's Luna-onee-sama."
"It's Luna-onee-sama!"
"Yoo-hoo, you two are so cute. Are you ready?"
Luna maintained her high-tension state while hugging the two of them.
"We're ready!"
"We can go anytime!"
"How reliable!! I’m all set too!! Yuki, isn't it time yet!?"
Don't turn around so suddenly. It's scary.
"I was just about to call the guests. I got word from Steve and the others that they’ve already entered the waiting room."
"Great!! Then, all staff, get to your positions!!"
At Luna’s command, the people around us scurried off to their spots in the studio.
"Aslin, you two have your turn a bit later, so just wait, okay?"
"Okay. Good luck, Luna-onee-sama."
"Good luck!"
"E-eh!? W-wait, why is Dressa-sama calling her that!?"
"Yes, yes, that’s just the kind of event this is."
"Let's go to the waiting room so we don't get in the way."
Labyris and Shera led the bewildered Dressa away.
"……Hey, you Useless Goddess."
"What? Hey, Camera 2, move a little to the right!!"
"Yes, sir!!"
"……Dressa called you 'Luna-sama.' Did you spill the beans?"
"Hm? Oh, yeah. That girl is so pure and sweet. I just shone a little halo, and she started worshipping me. Unlike some people, she has a clean heart. Besides, you’ve already had Labyris and the others surrounded by her, so she would have found out eventually, right?"
"……There’s an order to these things."
"It doesn't matter. It’s not like I’m losing anything, and my number of believers is just increasing."
That’s exactly what I’m worried about.
"Camera 4, make sure your body is secured so you don't fall! An accident during filming would be no laughing matter!!"
"Yes!!"
"……Stop giving orders to the staff on your own."
"Why not? The stars of this show are me and her, aren't they? You, who’s always lurking in the shadows, should just focus on supporting us. Starting mic check!! Testing, testing, is the voice coming through?"
"It’s coming through!!"
This is hopeless. She’s completely fired up.
"Sigh, just follow the script."
"I know, I know. Why would I ruin something this fun?"
……I wish she realized that the fact she thinks that makes her untrustworthy in the first place.
"Come on, go call the guests already. Our side is almost finished."
"……Yeah, yeah."
Told to do so, I went to call the guests. Sigh. Even though it was my idea, using Luna as an actress is giving me a stomach ulcer. I’ll search desperately for a way to finish this without relying on her in the future. Actually, the root cause of this whole thing is……
"Y-Yuki-dono. I will make sure this goes well, so please, just a little more time."
"……Hifi. It’s already pointless."
Yes, it’s these two.
"I mean, Luna has already started moving, so you know it’s too late, right?"
"……Au."
Perhaps realizing it was a lost cause, she slumped her shoulders.
"I’m asking for a reduced sentence, too. You took my precious items hostage, didn't you?"
"Well, I told Luna to go easy on the punishment game, so that’s not an issue. The real problem is that you two sent them out thinking they’d have good chemistry with Noble, but you ended up being the ones who caused Noble and his people to rise up—or rather, get fired up. You can't go around pouring oil on a fire."
"That's true..."
"……Yes, I suppose so."
Exactly. According to information from Kirika and Comet, these two were the ones who created the reason why the god known as Noble decided to give it his all until today.