落とし穴外伝：２０２３年末スペシャル クリスマスに欲しいモノ
Pitfall Side Story: 2023 Year-End Special – What I Want for Christmas
Side: Yuki
"Phew..."
I let out a sigh, settling onto the chilly veranda.
Behind me, the banquet hall was still caught in the throes of a Christmas ruckus.
Today was the 25th.
The children were overjoyed with their presents, and their mothers watched over them with tender, heartwarming smiles.
And those mothers, too, were wearing magnetic earrings.
Yes, I was the one who had gifted those magnetic earrings, naturally.
I had successfully completed the arduous task of selecting and distributing presents to my wives, my children, and everyone who looked after me, just as I did every year.
"Every year, I run out of ideas. I’m already dreading next year."
Having so many wives makes it incredibly difficult to choose; if the gifts aren't of equal value, it creates all sorts of problems regarding their standing.
I tell myself I should just cut corners, but I’m too afraid to actually do it.
Maybe I should just talk to them about it?
Tell them I’ve run out of ideas.
We’re husband and wife, after all, and I ask the kids for their requests.
Is that an option?
As I was pondering this...
"Yuki-san. What are you doing out here?"
I turned at the sudden voice to find Taiki-kun, who had been attending the party, standing there.
"Ah, just... taking a break, I suppose?"
"Why the question mark? Though, I do understand the sentiment."
Taiki-kun said this as he sat down beside me, offering me a cup of tea.
"It’s still warm."
"Thanks."
I accepted it gratefully, letting the hot tea soothe my throat and warm my body.
Ah, hot tea is the best.
After a brief silence, I spoke.
"I’m glad everyone is enjoying themselves every year, but for me... it’s not that I’m bored, exactly, but it’s just..."
"Haha, it’s still a novel event for everyone here. It’s quite different from the original, but it’s just a milestone at the end of the year, isn't it?"
"Yeah. Let’s leave the religious aspects of Christmas to Earth; here, it’s fine as a day to spend with children, lovers, and family."
Mixing in religion just leads to nothing but trouble.
It’s nice to have a day where families, or even individuals, can spend a little extravagantly.
Still, I was admittedly exhausted.
"Come to think of it, Yuki-san, you give out presents, but what about receiving them?"
"No, I receive them just fine from you and Taizo-san, don't I?"
I don't know what he’s talking about; Taiki-kun gave me some interesting manga recommendations, and Taizo-san gave me a novel I’d taken a liking to.
They aren't famous works, but they were printed well enough.
Though, in the modern era—the time I came from—the authors' names aren't exactly household words.
That’s the level we’re talking about.
Well, that doesn't mean they’re boring, which is the interesting part.
Just because something is interesting doesn't mean it sells.
It makes you wonder what the deciding factor is.
But setting that aside, we were talking about Christmas presents.
"Ah, no, that’s not what I meant. What I’m saying is, you don't seem to be as happy receiving them as they are."
I looked toward the banquet hall, where my wives, children, and the others were still buzzing with excitement over their gifts.
Seeing them made me smile.
And I began to understand what Taiki-kun meant.
"Well, I’m not exactly jumping for joy. I suppose there’s a feeling that, at my age, receiving presents is a bit..."
"I see, that’s it."
"Adults are the ones who give presents, after all. And I’m not sure how it happened, but I’m a ruler, so that’s even more the case. And I’ve had enough of changing clothes for one day."
Yes, I’m happy for my wives' feelings, of course.
And it’s sweet that they tell me they chose the gifts with the children.
But that’s different from being giddy over receiving a present.
This year, my wives and children all gave me several outfits, and I ended up having to change into them on the spot, turning it into a fashion show.
"Haha. That looked tough."
"I think women who can enjoy clothes are amazing. I just can't do it."
I suppose that’s why I’m sitting out here on the veranda—that kind of fatigue.
Changing clothes is exhausting.
My wives and children were having a blast, but I don't have that much attachment to fashion.
"I’d still prefer games or something..."
"The kids are playing games, and it’s hard for us adults to join in without it being awkward, isn't it?"
"You’re right about that."
It’s not like it’s a gaming tournament; if I were just playing a game by myself, I’d be branded as having poor social skills for an adult.
I know it’s unreasonable, but if someone asked what the party was for, they’d have a point.
"Well, setting that aside, there was something I wanted to ask you, Yuki-san."
"Hm? What is it?"
"Well, Christmas is over safely today—or rather, this year—but is there anything you actually wanted as a present? I was just wondering."
"Something I want, huh? Fortunately, since coming here, I haven't had any financial troubles. I can usually get whatever I want."
"That’s true. I feel the same way. That’s why, after the Christmas party ended, I suddenly thought about how I used to want this or that, but now, I don't really feel that way. Is it because we have money?"
"Probably. If we didn't have money, we’d probably be hanging around toy stores, staring longingly through the glass."
"Haha, I don't think it’s quite that bad, but you know. If we were back in Japan, we might want a car, a motorcycle, or a nice watch."
Ah, the hobbies of an adult.
"Well, that depends on the person. I’m not good with things that require a lot of maintenance and upkeep."
Exactly. Cars and motorcycles require inspections and maintenance, and jewelry is the same.
If you don't have the knowledge, they’ll just fall apart, so you have to study.
If you have a passion for that, it’s fine, but I don't have the energy to spare for it.
"Games and plastic models are just right."
"True. Well, jewelry might be an asset, but we aren't buying them to sell them off or to build wealth..."
"Exactly. But when you think about it, it means we don't have much material desire. After all, we can manage just fine with our own salaries."
"We’re living comfortably, after all. So, does that mean what we want isn't a 'thing,' but something else?"
"I suppose so."
If we don't need material things, it stands to reason that what we want would be something else.
"Well, as a joke, I’ve thought about a fighter jet."
"No, no, I understand the romance of it, but the maintenance costs alone—not to mention having to secure an airport—would be an astronomical sum."
"Ah, you’re right. And in my case, if I consider the survival rate in the event of a plane or fighter jet crash, my wives would be dead set against it."
"That’s impossible, then."
Yes, it’s an impossible story.
"Sorry. So, other than material things, a vacation would be the top candidate. Days where I can just wander around without guards or surveillance."
"I understand that. It’s not easy to go out these days. Well, it’s been much easier since Weed was built, though."
"That’s the reward for building this place. Still, that’s how it is. It’s not realistic. Or wait, was Christmas supposed to be about wishing for unrealistic things?"
"They say miracles happen, but do you think they’ll come to us?"
"No, I’m not going to ask, because they might actually do it."
I shuddered at the thought of Luna and Hairen, who were playing with the children in the banquet hall.
"They’d misinterpret it and something outrageous would happen... It’s scary knowing there are actual goddesses around."
"Right?"
Christmas could turn into a horror story in an instant.
"Well, if I had to wish for something... I’d want my fatigue from today not to carry over to tomorrow."
"That’s a good one. No matter how late you stay up, you’re fully recovered the next day! But wouldn't that just be some kind of strange drug?"
"Well, effectively, it’s a nutritional supplement. But having no fatigue is nice, isn't it? Think about it, it could be used for other things, too."
Like drinking it after a battle or a mountain of paperwork, and being fully recovered when the date changes.
We chatted like that, and when we returned to the banquet hall, it seemed the wives had overheard our talk about an anti-fatigue energy drink and started discussing trying to make one.
Well, it’s not a bad idea, so I thought I’d go along with it.
A drink that leaves you fully recovered the next day.
I wonder, will it be used for its intended purpose?
Well, setting that aside, pulling all-nighters is tough when you’re an old man.
Young people, enjoy it while you can.