落とし穴７５堀：竹を流るる水と麺 (Part2)
Taiki and Taizo were already standing by at the end of the bamboo flume, bowls in hand, filled with dipping sauce and their preferred condiments. They looked like soldiers poised for battle, ready for the noodles to come at any moment.
"Alright, here it comes!"
"Ready when you are!"
"Bring it on!"
With that, I started the somen flowing.
Under the brilliant summer sun, the white noodles raced down the bamboo, carried by the cool, clear water. The two men snatched them up with their chopsticks, dunked them into their bowls, and slurped them down in one go.
"This is the stuff!"
"Mm. Simply impeccable."
Both of them looked thoroughly satisfied. Since there didn't seem to be any issues, I figured it was time for everyone else to join in.
"Big brother! Hurry!"
"I want to eat too!"
"Me too! Me too!"
"And me! Don't forget me!"
Aslin and Firia were one thing, but Riel and Ria were just as hyped up. Well, if they were having fun, I was happy to provide.
"Riel, try to calm down a little."
"You too, Ria. Have some dignity as a Hero..."
Tori and Jessica were the ones offering the reprimands, but since they were both standing there with their bowls and chopsticks at the ready, it was really a case of the pot calling the kettle black.
"But wait," Rurua noted, spotting a flaw. "If we all eat, doesn't that mean someone has to stay at the top to keep the somen flowing?"
Deryu looked toward me, seemingly wondering how I planned to handle that.
"Fufu. Don't worry," Seraria said with a relaxed smile, already waiting with her bowl. "My husband wants us to be happy, so I'm sure he’ll work his hardest for us. Right, dear?"
"That's right," another added. "And if you get tired, we'll be sure to 'feed' you ourselves."
The wives' eyes all took on a predatory glint.
"...Yuki, give it your all."
"Lord Yuki! Please, keep them coming!"
"Yes! Keep pouring until you've got nothing left!"
Wait, why does it feel like I'm the only one doing the pouring? Hey, I set up other lanes, go use those! And why are Taiki and Taizo still on the receiving end? Shouldn't they be helping?
I shot a look at the two men, and a silent conversation passed between us.
*‘Sorry. The wives stopped us.’*
*‘Hifi-san got mad and told me to be more considerate. My apologies.’*
...Are you kidding me? You want me to keep three lanes flowing constantly by myself? What kind of torture is this?
"Please, do not worry. I, Kirue, shall provide proper support."
Just as I was about to sink into despair, my wonderful wife and the paragon of maids, Kirue, stepped up to my side.
"Thank you, Kirue! You're a lifesaver."
"Not at all. With me here to hand you the noodles, you won't have to turn around to grab them yourself. You can keep the flow going without a single pause."
"Wait, what? Aren't you going to take over one of the lanes? And where's Sasari?"
"Oh, no. I could never dream of stealing the spotlight from the wonderful event my Master worked so hard to prepare. Please, give it your absolute best. It will be fine; if you collapse, I shall take great care of you—both as your wife and your maid. As for Sasari, she is busy prepping more noodles and looking after the children."
Is she a demon?!
However, complaining any further would just ruin the mood and make the food taste bitter. There was no point in setting this up if I was just going to grumble. I had no choice but to buckle down and do it.
"Alright! Here we go!"
"""YEAH!"""
Fine! If that's how it's going to be, I'll stuff them so full they won't be able to move!
With that spiteful determination, I began frantically sending somen down the lines.
...In the end, whenever you try to do something fancy like this, someone always ends up suffering for it. I worked my tail off for my wives, but I think I finally understand the plight of a housewife who just wants to serve somen because it's easy, only to have everyone complain. Mom, I'm sorry for all those times I grumbled when you served somen for lunch.
By the way, the result of the "Nagashi Somen Battle" was a partial victory for me. I managed to feed Aslin, Firia, Riel, Ria, Jessica, and Deryu until they were completely immobilized.
However, the wives—led by Seraria—had been pacing themselves. Since they still had plenty of energy left while I was completely spent, they ended up "devouring" me in the end.
Seriously, doing things you aren't used to is exhausting. They took full advantage of my inability to move under the guise of "nursing" me back to health.
Well, they're my wives, so I suppose I can't complain too much.
And that was our little summer story.
***
Yes. Based on previous suggestions for summer activities, I decided to go with the very Japanese tradition of Nagashi Somen. Thanks for all the input!
So, speaking of somen, have you all had some yet? Or are you getting tired of it as you try to work through the boxes of gift somen?
That leads to a question: what are your favorite condiments for the dipping sauce?
Green onions are the classic, but some people like ginger or even shichimi pepper. Personally, I'm a green onion fan.
See you next time!