239: Talking about how a former adventurer wouldn’t know how to handle a lady

The world’s full of nonsense.

Yeah, like when a woman in a risky pose is lying in my bed, and I’m in my underwear.

Or when, right in the middle of me freaking out over it, the girls all come bursting in.

I won’t accept this kind of nonsense!

Orthros Gandar von Bairoroad glares with icy eyes.

“Craft, kneel.”

“H-huh…?”

I drop straight to my knees, obedient as ever, and Maina starts lightly smacking me.

Everyone’s staring—cold as ice!

I didn’t do anything wrong, but I can’t fight back! Damn it!

I don’t have the power to stand up to this kind of injustice, Mama…

Only Ryuuko stays calm, checking the woman still lying there.

“Just sleeping, Master. You brought her in, didn’t you?”

"No way! I don’t have the guts to bring a woman here like that!"

I blurted it out without thinking.

Half the women in the room let out loud, dramatic sighs. Heard something like "wimp," but probably just my imagination.

Wait—didn’t you all just complain about me bringing a woman in?!

Anyway, maybe because I shouted, the woman lying down stirred and shifted.

“Ghuff… My first time… ain’t cheap, y’know… ghuff… nfff?…”

The girl sat up slowly, still half-asleep. Ryuuko quickly fixed her clothes. I relaxed a little.

Her face was hidden by her bangs, but I wiped the drool off her chin.

She’s still half-dreaming, mumbling.

"...So many beautiful girls here... nufufu... I don’t mind a harem of girls... nufu... ghuff..."

Uh... what the hell is this guy?

I can feel my spine go cold. Another newbie pervert.

Then Eva’s eyes snapped open.

“Ah. I’ve seen this face before.”

“Know him?”

“No. Can’t remember his name. But I do remember avoiding him like the plague.”

I get that.

“Don’t remember much, but he had high magic potential. Never showed up for training though.”

“Just another lazy teammate.”

“Don’t want to admit it, but yeah. Pretty much.”

While we were talking, the girl finally stirred awake. Her mumbling finally quieted down.

“Man, the chasers today are really lively. Finally giving up on sneaking into a beauty’s bedroom, huh? Or maybe the pretty girl’s night visit was just too much for her to resist? Guffuffuffuffu.”

Always talking with no consistency, huh? What kind of dialects are mixed in there?

Anyway, you’re the pursuer?

I barely glanced at Ryuko, and she nodded, stepping out of the room. Sharp as ever.

"Alright, finally awake? Explain why you’re sleeping in someone’s room."

Too many questions. Where the hell do I even start?

"This is my country estate. …Men were around too. Quite to my taste."

"What’s that supposed to mean? I don’t care what you say. Not even a little bit."

"Aw, that’s harsh! You’ve never been praised by such a super-dreamy girl before!?"

I don’t feel anything feminine about you right now, even if you were sleeping!

Maina’s poking me with watery eyes—can you please stop doing that?!

"Anyway, what’s this ‘country estate’ thing? I heard this was just a guest room."

"Nobody’s around usually, so I’m just using it, that’s all."

"A habitual offender when it comes to unauthorized use..."

I’m starting to get the picture here.

"So you ran away from training, from your duties, and hid out here."

"Ooh, you’re sharp, sir."

"Anyone could figure that out!"

Talking to this girl gives me a headache.

At least she’s not some assassin or whatever.

Still, she’s a complete disaster.

Anyway, should I stop kneeling now?

I shoot Leifan a look, and she sighs, then gives a reluctant nod.

I stand up, brushing off the dust, and she’s already turned to face Eva.

"Huh? Isn’t that Eva?"

"Yeah, you remember me?"

"Sure. Back then, we were rivals for the title of recluse."

I don’t even remember your name.

"Wha—?! Why not?!"

"No, you’re the one who hardly ever showed up at the training grounds."

"Genius don’t need effort, that’s just how it is!"

"Huh... I guess."

Eva looks utterly drained. Just listening to her makes me tired.

"Huh? Wait—so then, the outsider guests... you guys, right?"

"Us, yeah."

"So that means we’ve cracked the world’s secret!?!"

"Who knows. That’s why I came back to talk about it....You know a lot about the world’s secret, don’t you?"

"Whoa! I thought I’d be dragged into some big meeting—Kingdom folks and the island’s existence, y’know? No need to run away at all! Ah, I mean, I’ve been researching it, that’s all. Honestly, some of it’s already out in the open."

The door to the room burst open with a loud *bang* mid-sentence.

There they were—same group of mages from the festival earlier.

“You’re the one who didn’t even listen to the whole damn thing and locked yourself away! What’s that supposed to mean?”

“We told you from outside! You’re the one who ran off!”

“Always hiding in your room like a hermit, but suddenly you’re all quick on your feet when it matters?”

They were furious.

From what we could piece together: the mages had come to arrange a meeting with the pervert woman, but she’d locked herself in her room, probably picked the lock, then fled. They’d found her hiding in the guest room’s Bambaloo.

“Apologies for the noise. I’ll explain everything later. You can take this messy one off my hands.”

“Please do.”

“Good, that saves time.”

Before the words even finished, one of the mages hoisted the disheveled woman onto his shoulder.

"Wait! That kind of treatment’s a disgrace to a lady!?"

"We don’t have any special tastes for perverts like you!"

"Protest! I demand—gah—this kind of treatment is—"

They came like the wind, screamed their perversion, and vanished like the wind.

"Feels like the storm just passed."

"Same here."

Not just me—Evva looked utterly drained.

"Anyway, the misunderstanding’s cleared. Can we sleep now?"

"Indeed. We’re worn out. Let’s talk tomorrow?"

"Would be a big help."

So we laid down and called it a night.

……Guess I’ll see that lazybones again tomorrow.

◆

The next day, I was summoned right away by Evva’s master, the old Paradio.

Surrounded by mage-like old men, the pervert woman from yesterday was there just as normal.

Paradio spoke with a tired voice.

“Hear about last night’s ruckus. Seemed to cause trouble.”

“Nah, well, about that…”

“Normally, I wouldn’t want you at this important meeting, but she’s capable.”

“Huh.”

“Got a lot on your mind, I’m sure. But I’d like you to understand.”

“Yeah, fine by me.”

“Good. Now, straight to it… Evva.”

“Yes. The secret of the world… it’s believed the World Tree holds the key.”

Paradio glanced briefly at the pervert woman.

“Ah. Same conclusion as Lilirily, I see.”

Apparently, her name was Lilirily.

Wait—what!?

Even this pathetic person figured it out too!?

She didn’t speak aloud, but Evva’s face showed clear shock.

Yeah. I get it.

Paradio gives a small nod.

"Ah. Indeed, we hidden ones do believe the World Tree plays a major role in the world's secrets. But is that all?"

Evva glances sideways at me. She knows.

From my spatial storage, I pull out a heavily sealed chest and open the lid.

Paradio and the old man—probably the ones called Hidden Ones—stare wide-eyed, frozen in place. Lilirily leans forward and shouts.

"Hey! Don’t go saying things like the World Tree!?"

That "hey"—no way. It’s getting weird, though.

And so, the discussion heats up from the very first moment.

Leifan murmurs quietly.

"Why does it always get bigger when Craft’s involved? Huh? Why?"

Not my fault, okay!?

The manga volume 6 of "Kibi Alchemy" is coming out November 7th—